Wilted White Daffodils

It is confusing

This hollow emptiness –

Decaying moods –

And the futile attempt to

Destroy it.

Longing it could be;

Outside the window –

I see plants swaying

to the gentle breeze,

Two soaring doves;

I see the swinging wind chimes;

The closed windows,

Lets nothing inside -

Not the breeze

Nor the gentle music of the chime;

I close my eyes –

The clamor in my head

Is too loud to bear;

My soul brewing in its inner flame

Gnaws at your absence –

Your memories casts a shadow – that

I can’t just brush and leave –

I close my eyes only to see wilted white daffodils;

A meadow of wilted white daffodils –

Such beauty when the thousands of dead wilted white daffodils

Dances to the soundless music of zephyr -

I realize solitude too is bliss.

I open my eyes –

And notice the sky is clear;

I open the windows –

It takes me at once –

The breeze swirls;

Music of the chime pleasant;

Clear sky brings a fleeting smile;

As it reminded me that -

Your ship too will come shore, because

The day is not over, yet!

I kissed my Soul

I was thrilled. When experiencing new things/events, I get a buzz so high that nothing can ever match the feeling. You could imagine my excitement when I say I was going to experience two spectacular things on the same day.

For days together, I looked forward to it. And after what seemed like an eternity, D day came. After a ‘fabulous’ two days at Vegas, we drove down to Grand Canyon of what was going to become one of the most cherished moments of my life. After a not-so-strenuous drive we arrived at our destination.

We were to take a helicopter ride over the canyon, I couldn't’t wait. After watching the two minute video on safety precautions, I wandered restlessly around the gift shop waiting for them to call me to board. My husband unlike me is the patient one; he waited at the lounge with our cousin and friend to be called.

After a little while, a friendly Mexican spat out our names with great difficulty, then buckled the deflated life jacket around my waist just in case! Followed by a quick photo opportunity in front of our to-be helicopter and thirty minute wait with a happy Brazilian couple, we were on board. News is I got to sit in the front next to the pilot, jackpot! There is no place else in the helicopter where you could get the unobstructed view of the canyon.

Only after a couple of seconds of taking off, we could already see the rim of the canyon, as we neared…

I GASPED.

I was transfixed by the vastness, grandeur and the silence of the canyon. For a few moments, I sat there with my mouth open gaping at it trying to comprehend what I was seeing, the formations that took billions of years to be what it is today.

Stories about the origin of the Canyon are many. Every tribe that ever made Canyon their home has their own legendary heroes and gods that gave canyon its splendor. There were/is stories about gold and gems and all that is valuable hidden in one of the many caverns in the Canyon, there were/are pursuers who were relentless in their search to find them and in the process sadly even gave their life to what in large seems like a myth. Besides the vastness, the mystery that surrounds the great canyon adds drama to the experience.

It was not until I set my eyes on the canyon I knew what platonic love meant. Music poured, heart was tangled in a web trying to make sense of the unknown. In the presence of such splendor, I wished to unlearn all that I learnt over the years making space for something that sans everything I knew until that moment. I remembered something I read: To not endure is to end in despair. I wished to continue the ride, a journey of no-return, keeping company the waning moon and pass into mere oblivion and be what Dyer – the poet said: My mind to me a kingdom is.

It is humanly impossible to write/capture the essence of the Canyon, but it is true that when I was there flying above the canyon, all the reasons of the world seemed trivial almost non-existent. I still see them, even hear them.

I will forever remember that day, because while gawking at the beauty of Canyon, I KISSED MY SOUL.